I know I haven't really blogged lately. Not because I haven't had the time, but more because I love seeing this little face in the mornings
And to be honest, my photo blog takes up a bit of time sometimes. If I would just take my pictures with one device, it might make it easier. But no, I have my phone, tablet, my camera, Jeremy's camera, and sometimes pictures other people take that they send to me. It can be a lot to go through and put together. But it has been fun to see all the pictures that we take everyday and watch Caleb as he gets older and remember days. Some of those photos feel like yesterday, and they where a whole month ago! I've found there are days and memories I only remember because I took a picture of it. And not so much the things these past few months, but I noticed it with the pictures from my first go around. I almost wish I'd stuck with it. But lets be honest, there would have been a lot of pictures of textbooks.
Caleb is so much fun and is one of the two bright lights in my life. He's smiling, giggling, grabbing at things, sucking on them, blowing raspberries and he knows who is mama is. I'll be honest, my favorite is when I can see him excited to see me. He's found his feet and loves to play with them. If I put pants or a sleeper that has animals on them he almost pulls them off trying to get them. But if there's no cute animal to grab, well, them toes work really well. He's also started rolling over...occasionally. He'll do it a couple of times and then he won't. I don't know if he forgets he can or what his deal is, but at least he's started. I also think he'll be sitting up by Christmas. We got him to sort of sit up with his arms propped up, but he hasn't done it since that one time. But he's got a month to work on it. He is just too much fun. Can you believe he'll be four months next Saturday?
I've accepted a job with Independence Rehab and I'll start work at Orchard Park (They contract with independence rehab). Can't say I'm super thrilled or excited to be bluntly honest. I always thought I would have to be one of those moms who in order to save her sanity needed to work. Or at least to not kill her kids. And I've heard that everything changes when you have a baby. How I found that to be true. I don't think I have been happier than my days closeted in with my little boy. No its not always sunshine and flowers (and I'm still trying to find the butterflies and shooting stars about breastfeeding), and there are days when I've stared at the clock willing it to be 5:00 so Jeremy can take him for a few while I shower or do something. But I've been happy.
When we first got married, I had just been accepted in to the OTA program. Jeremy was working for eBay and decided that he needed a break from school. The idea was to push me through school, it was only two years, and I'll work while he goes to school since I could make more money than he could at eBay anyways. It made sense. Especially since I couldn't go to school and work much. Then we got pregnant. I was still going to go to work, and Jeremy was going to quit and stay with the babe. All his classes were night classes anyways. It would work. And it'd only be for a while.
But it means leaving my baby. Logically it makes sense. But I'm going to miss my little guy. I've found that I'm cut out for this staying at home mom thing. It might change when he's three, but that's a ways off. But I guess we do things in life that we have to do. Its not always easy or ideal. But it needs to be done. I'm done mourning. I'll cry Monday morning and maybe every day next week, but its time to buck up and focus on the positive. More money will be nice. Hopefully. I'm excited to buy new hand towels for the bathroom (so badly needed, but never a priority) and maybe even save up to replace Jeremy's car (an impossibility at the moment). And its time for me to put my degree to use. I know if I don't use it soon I'll forget everything I've learned at school. And I will have wasted time, money, resources, and other's generosity who with their scholarship donations made it possible for me to go through with no debt. Not to mention Jeremy's sacrifices he's made to keep me in school. I know if I don't work now, when I try to in five years I will be a substandard therapist. And patients and employers deserve better.
So that's it. Monday starts a new section in this latest chapter of our household. Hopefully it turns out well.
PS If you've missed it...don't know how, but it happens. My link to my photo a day. http://kayleysphotoaday.blogspot.com/
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